Slow mornings

I like my slow mornings, but I think I’ve become a little bit too good at them. I need to speed them up a little bit. It takes me too long to get to my desk and the longer it takes the more difficult it becomes.

I have work to do. I need to work. Work is good for my head. I want to work hard, a want to be busy. I need that too.

I know that structure is good for me, and that sitting around and just being is not. When I’m not busy, I tend to think too much. And overthinking causes anxiety.

I actually feel best when I just go and do stuff, without thinking too much about it. That’s how I used to be. When I wanted something, I simply worked for it. Even if I wasn’t sure if it will work out, if it’s within my reach. I just did it. I had Pippi Longstocking approach “I have never tried that before, so I think I should definitely be able to do that.”

I’m getting there. I’m almost back at my old self, but it’s still work in progress. But I want to get there, so I will.